Recently I’ve been talking about how I came to make the decision to use donor eggs. I realised that the biggest step-change in my decision-making happened when I asked myself a simple question –...
Defining Motherhood
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Holding two places
I've been meaning to write about this for a while now, especially since Jana Rupnow and I talked about it in a recent episode of Three Makes Baby podcast - click here to listen. It was another...
Love isn’t genetically programmed
I’m sharing because I believe sometimes we can overthink this, particularly when it comes to fears around bonding before we have our children. Think about all of the people you love in your life...
“Empathy comes from being empathised with”
One of the most important skills I've always wanted my children to have is empathy. Above anything else I believe it is so important to have the ability to put yourself in someone else's shoes,...
Likeness to Daddy
This picture popped up on my memories today from 3 years ago. Mila at almost 6 months old (those chubby cheeks 🥰) and Matt at a similar age. They're the same baby, right?! I still can't believe how...
The significance of small-talk
As I've been busy planning my DefiningMum event (announcement coming soon!) I've been thinking a lot about the different fears and challenges that we inevitably face as parents who don't share...
“Just like Mummy”
I plan to be very open with Mila, Eska and Lena about how they were conceived using an egg donor. We don't share genetics but despite this, we are still very similar in so many ways - all because of...
Did she get her curls from the mum?
“Did she get her curls from the Mum?” Ouch. This is one comment I’ve had in relation to donor conception that really hit a nerve. It’s actually been said twice, once to Matt from someone I’ve never...
Society’s focus on family resemblances
Society tends to focus on appearances when it comes to family. Naturally we are drawn to search for similarities, especially when it comes to babies. My husband thinks all babies look the same, but...
Facing fears relating to donor conception
Many on Instagram have engaged with my posts about fears - thank you for confirming that I'm not alone! These fears are important to acknowledge & I believe talking about them can better equip...
Finding out we’d need to use a donor
I still remember exactly where I was, what the weather was like, even what I was wearing when I first heard the 'D' word. By 'D' word I mean 'Donor'. It was so life-altering for me that the memory...
Sharon’s Story – Egg Donation
I’m not sure if I differ from any other donor egg recipient mums. The wrong side of 35 (I put my career first) my husband and I started trying for a baby and assumed we’d get pregnant naturally....
Do I Regret Not Trying Again With My Own Eggs?
Regret - Feeling sad, repentant or disappointed over something one has done or failed to do. I’m asked often if I regret not trying again with my own eggs. I can honestly say that I don’t feel one...
Redefining my vision of a Mum…
It wasn’t a simple choice based on odds alone, it was a complex emotional decision that took time. I realise now that one blocker for me was worrying about what others might think – the main worry...
Recognising the odds were stacked against us…
Throughout our infertility journey I was completely emotion-led, to the point where all rational thinking went out of the window. Anything that gave us a possibility, however small and expensive it...
How did I know when it was time to use a donor?
This is probably the most common question I get asked and definitely the most difficult to answer! It’s a complex decision…everyone has their own individual thoughts, experiences, diagnosis, hormone...
Sarah’s Story – Telling the Child
I’m Sarah, a 46 year old mum to a 6 year old son, conceived in northern Cyprus by anonymous egg donation. When my husband and I initially embarked on the donor conception part of our journey,...
Epigenetics
I’m by no means a scientific person, I’m much more interested and motivated by the ‘fluffy stuff’ – feelings and relationships and it’s probably because of this that personally I never really felt a...
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I’m Becky, an incredibly grateful 34 year old donor egg IVF mum to three beautiful girls. I live in the UK with my husband Matt as well as Mila, aged 3 and twins Eska and Lena, aged 2.
